A Moment… Frozen...

I still remember that cold winter morning. It was the same day as today. 16^th November. The date I remember more than my own birthday. I had made things ready the earlier day itself. A Dairy Milk chocolate, a Hallmark Greeting card few words and lot of emotions. I was ready for that day. 

With a great mood I was off to school waiting to meet her. Cold wintery morning... chills my spine but love burning in my heart. Ready for the big day! I still wonder can people be so blind that they just ignore some things that everyone else sees !!?? Standing in rows for the assembly, I was eagerly waiting for her to come up on the stage during the birthday song. We had kinda practice to celebrate student’s n teacher’s birthdays n bringing them on the stage. I was in the school choir n was the loudest for the song (possibly). Then came the classes n I couldn’t wait for the recess to start n have some time spent with that angel.

Finally that moment arrived which was since then frozen inside me n now glorified till eternity by these words. Standing along the wall, I watched the kids playing. However all of me was waiting for her to come to me. She came and stood next to me. I wished her happy birthday n asked her for a chocolate. She said ‘Sorry, sab khatam ho gaye kal pakka!’ (‘Sorry, there are none left, tomorrow for sure’). I smiled. Then silently I gave her the chocolate n card I had been hiding inside my shirt. I guess I got her a present too. Few things get blurred… 

Having few things said and nothing done, I felt a sharp pain. Then I left the scene. Even today the same question haunts me: When will that girl understand what’s in my heart ?

Few moments take a lifetime to arrive. I’m waiting for a moment with her again. The same way it was; In silence.

                                                                               ~ Khan.

Kasara - My new love...

Hardly, you get an opportunity to be closer to nature. To be one with the nature from which you were created. The beauty is thrilling! It excites you to such a level that there is no other option but to praise its beauty. This thrill fills up your blood with adrenalin and you are pushed to such a level of excitement you can’t express! It’s a mighty feeling, a power that lets you roar to the top of your voice. The view is so heavenly, you get lost in its vastness. And after that, it leaves you in a serene state.

One such experience of me is during my journey from Nagpur to Mumbai and back. The region is Kasara Ghats; my new love. Even now as I’m travelling in the train after clicking over a hundred pics of the great Ghats, I feel a sense of satisfaction in my heart that I could capture the most of those thrilling moments of my life. There’s only one thing you can think of during that patch of nature’s greatness is to fall in love with the Creator who thought of it.

And I bet you can’t escape its beauty once you see it. Simply give yourself a chance to let your heart go behind it. Next thing you would be doing is praising its awesome beauty. The most wonderful time was when the train took over its complete strength of all the engines attached to it. As it gave an equal competition to the wind running next to it. The clouds even took part in this race and sent rains to sanctify the ground. All this happening around me, was a dream. My clothes trying to stay on my body; so as my feet were. My face was uplifted with a serene expansion of the facial muscles towards the ends of my jaws. The skin had an acupuncture given by the rain drops hitting at speeds of over 100kmph ! And, it was amazing ! Nothing in this world could give that feeling again.

Then came the time when the mighty beast was in the mountains at a pretty high altitude. The valleys and the greenery all around was enchanting, The fog had crowned the whole of the arena and gave beautiful moments for me to look through my lens and have them preserved for ever. The small streams of water flowing down the valleys making their ways smooth, cutting down stones was a treasured moment. Hopefully some animal would surely drink from those streams I set my eyes on.

Later when the snake trails ended, I realized that now it was going to get over, when the Creator put before me another wonder of His hands. It was still raining and the Sun gave a peeping look out of the clouds. I remembered my 9th grade science chapter of optics which educated me that when the Sun is below 40degrees in the sky and the rains falling; due to multiple reflections phenomenon the light is split into seven wonderfully conjugated colours. In layman’s words, THE RAINBOW !

I quickly switched sides and was standing on the opposite door where an uncle held me to keep me from falling off as I adored the beauty of the seven coloured bow in front of me. It was the only thing in the world I could wish for that time (except a charging point for my cell phone aka Steelbite). Finally the rains gave themselves a rest and the train took off its path from the Ghats to the plateau. Still the sky had put up a nice show in agreement with the Sun.

Today, I learnt a secret of life. Happiness is enjoyed the best when it occurs of a few moments. Sadness on the other hand can be handled effectively if it’s done with a calm, satisfied and patient mind. Happiness can be treasured for long times. Sadness has been brought in this world through sin, and will continue to exist. But such moments give you a reason to smile even during the hardest of times. Having said and done all that I could (still feeling to write more), it’s time to give this a break. Adios fellas !

The Heart vs. The Gut

Today when I was driving to the church, I had this thought in my mind going since last night. Whether to listen to your heart or to go according to your gut feeling? I kept on thinking on it as I drove on and it went rather funny. The heart has got quite a few incoming & outgoing ways, well physically. And the gut has only two; either up or down, rather say to hold on or to let go. So when you say that one should listen to his/her heart, there are many opinions of the heart. Too much confusion to decide what is right. On the other hand, your gut feeling is much easier to decide. It points only in either of the ways.

So how I went on to this is; see, when you’ve got something in your gut, (talking in the physical realm) you choose to let it go and relieve yourself of it. Or, you choose to hold it, until you find a nice place; depending on the situation in each case. So when you choose to let it go, it’s gone forever without making you even bother about it. In the latter case, which appeals me, you choose to hold it on. You go through a lot of pain and patience the whole time; you think and strain yourself, so that you can accomplish your goal. And when the time comes to deliver it, the impact of the outcome is much, much more that the first case. Even the relief is much better.

Letting go is a very common and everyday phenomenon for every one of us. But holding on is not everyone’s cup of tea. On a funny note, that’s what (a cup of tea) makes you drive out to the pot mostly. But it’s about them who hold on, they show the ability to control situations which can tempt them to let go. But success and happiness is far better for these guys. Those who hold on are the ones which desire more for the goal and work out their way out of all odds.

Now focusing on the heart, I find it to be a weird organ. The gut is far simpler. So many associations, doesn’t the heart get tired? The heart troubles you a lot. Makes you want things that are out of your reach, crave for them, n later, cry over it. It makes you love that pretty girl in your college, but not the courage to confront her.
Yet after attending church, I found out this – This heart has the treasure of life; Love. A pretty appealing dialogue of the movie ‘Chaos Theory’ is “The most interesting thing about love is you choose to receive it & you choose to give it. Making it the most random act in the universe” Yes it is simple! No matter what, but you choose. It contains the blessing of The Most High. Its core is what makes you who you are. Listening to your heart is only advisable if you know that it hears the heavenly sounds. Then you can decide that yes, it is right.

That’s all for now folks!

So who wins is up to you.

Do comment.

Illusion

Life’s an illusion, now I feel,
with this truth now I deal.
A morning, for others is a new start,
but each event, my life & me part.
Singing songs of the dreaded reality.

Life’s an illusion now I feel, with this truth now I deal.

Eyes what they see, is not what I feel,
my heart’s offspring I’ve to kill.
Every pain that I do receive,
leads to a harder me, that I conceive.
Each day is a new battle, with myself.

Afternoon sun overhead willingly smiles,
the road is tough, left more miles.
The human nature I’d like to kill,
just with the basics I would deal.
Here’s something I call ~ Philosophy!

Life’s being unfair, all the time,
dare not you ever drink that wine.
Reaping a desert rose with my tears,
I’ve been crying since long years.
Hope says, “It’s not gonna last forever!”

Offshore I see my life taken away,
“I don’t wanna go!” she’s screaming all way.
Down this heart, dreams I want to bring,
in this deathbed, my life’s wants to spring.
The air here is getting poisoned.

Friends n family are just mere words,
Better than me are those free birds.
Striving hard to just bring a smile,
All that you expect is a veil.
Relations are fake unwired connections.

Living alone is the best way to be,
Happiness will slowly come you’ll see.
With no one around, you won’t be hurt,
With least expectations, tears won’t spurt.
Loneliness will surely be your best friend.

But the One in me is greater than the world,
He says, I’m more than a conqueror.
He brings joy, fades away tears,
He says, “I’ll be with you till forever.”
My Father, My Best‘est’ Friend, My Companion.

The day when this illusion will break,
I’ll enter the Promised Land,
The truth that day will uncover,
And will flee what I used to fear.
This is my life ~ An illusion !

Insomniac

All of my sleeps’ out of order,
My pillow with tears now I water,
How long have I come?
How far I’ve got to go,
The silence night has; is killing,
I keep wondering,
Why do I keep dying ?
All the time . . . .

No place left to sleep,
No lap for this head to keep,
Some thoughts in the heart deep,
An unknown plant I’ve to reap,
In the stars wandering I keep,
Searching . . . .
For my very own light.

In this silent crowd; the world,
I search for someone not sold,
This dark city needs a dark knight,
To bring in an everlasting light

My own mock at me,
Some don’t even see,
Tongues say I’ve lost my heart,
Others laugh & say its mind,
That I’ve not got,
But it is my soul, thirsty; longing.

It feels like I’m insomniac,
Or simply I’ve turned maniac.

Sands of Time

The sea sweeps away,
& the wind covers on,
With infinite layers,
Those wonderful colours,

Those sands of time,
Together in a rhyme,
Just like a wind chime,
Take away . . . . everything.

Those in the limelight,
Were once under the streetlight,
We all do used to fight,
Just to tell, we are right,
Even show enough might.

But these are sands of time,
It will wash away,
& no stray marks will remain,
Here’s no loss or gain.

The world has left no time,
Everyone’s trying to mime,
& why each one has to be right ?
& me always on the other side ?

In these sands of time,
Off course, I was lost,
A way too I walked,
But it seems,
I’m again gonna be found.