My Theory of Love!

I carry a lot of masks on me day in and day out. I hear people say things about me, mostly good. Too many terms associated with my personality, I’m not gonna talk about a bit of anything that is my superficial mask. I am called intelligent, rational, leader, all those big fancy names everyone wants to hear, but deep down, in the unseen side of me lives a hopeless romantic. I might be exposing a very delicate side of me here, but then, I had promised to write this post to myself a long while back.

As an individual, from the time we grow, understand things, from the very time we come out in the world, we start recognizing people. Ever saw a kid smile at a known face? That. We all develop our own versions of the meaning of love. The way we have experienced love, or not. It’s a highly complicated yet a very simple feeling. Have heard of unconditional love ever? No? Have you ever been with your family or friends, every day of your life, no matter how much you think you hate them? That my friend, is unconditional love. Most of us try to give a hundred different reasons to why they love a particular person, to that I wonder, why not love just for the bloody sake of it? Love because you love to love! 

Might sound a bit weird, but let us see where these words take us. The feeling of love has always surprised me. From the point I ‘loved’ my grandpa dropping me to the bus stop to the point of looking at this someone, where I forget to breathe. I’ve had women in my very tiny lived life, I have women around me now, but taking a dive into that abyss, it’s scary that ever. The base of every relationship I believe is being able to spend time with the person, making them feel wanted for. I do respect that highly. Yet, I fail to do that. 

To be with someone, to belong, and love them, might be the most beautiful feeling ever. But if you can’t match to the tiniest of expectations springing up from this togetherness, it is better off. I would say that is the answer to the question I face often, Why are you single? So dear reader, when I know in the current phase of life, when it is difficult to make time even for lunch, how can I commit a part of life to someone? (Unless, the person can understand this part of life.) So that’s my concise theory. Maybe say just a postulate.    

More to this topic coming soon. 

Fear of Love!

On a chilly winter morning,

I write this love ballad

So may you dance and sing,

Celebrate the fear of love!

Solomon sang a while ago,

Love is strong as death

Its jealousy unyielding as the grave,

Who could love such a love?

A feeling no better than this,

Be loved, cared, valued and thought,

And feel the fright for your loved soul,

Who could love such a love?

In the growth of life arises this need,

To belong to someone and reduce to half,

Courage falls weak at this sight,

Who could love such a love?

As the vision travels in times ahead,

A face sparkles, a hand holds you through,

The quest for this soul began in long past,

Tell me! Who could love such a love?

The fright to loose, and be forgotten,

Lingers each day through, killing you,

The emotion is far too complex, too deep.

Who could love such a love?

I fear such a feeling, the emotion,

Exposing my deepest self,

Where love and wrath abode,

Who could love such a love? 

In the paths of the future and past,

Where the memories and visions last,

I search for a reason to still love,

And fall in the fear of this love! 

The Romantic Wreck

Sailing through many a mile,
I find no place to stretch,
enduring this world for a while,
the heart has a name to etch.

Your still seem to be my side,
the touch in my hands, on my lip,
that moment has frozen inside,
your look made my heartbeat dip.

I fell deeper in the unknown,
flying amidst the crowds, swept,
that beauty got my senses blown,
love, was the emotion now I felt.

Lost my mind, dreaming the day,
blurred vision, no path felt steady,
If love's a tragedy, as they say,
darling, you're my remedy!

~ Mr. Khan.

Photo Credits: AFOPhotography

Puzzle

I'm trying to find a way, a path to the unknown,
a street I never knew, a place I never saw,
in the midst of the chaotic crowd, find peace,
in the vastness of the sky, I seek refuge.

The days pass along with no sound of breeze,
each moment seems hard, the body wants ease.
I tread in the marsh, to find a land to plough,
thoughts wander along the beach, like the sand.

This bondage holds the soul, aching to leave,
this body seems dead, feels no ounce of pain.
a path I need, to surpass the bridge to self,
connect my being to the one living in me.

Attempting to unwind the entangled thoughts,
restore the upside curve on the mask,
spread the shoulders with a living breath,
restructure this shattered puzzled self.

Lost

Lost in the space engulfing me,
In the mild narrows shadowing sea,
Drifting paths lead to thee,
On the journey to the lost key.

Scattered thoughts in the emptied mind,
Wandering in them like a child,
Gaping wounds ease deeper pains,
Scars they leave like charred stains.

Unknown and uncertain is this phase,
Caught in tangling grip of the ways,
Storming inside are many of me,
Lost in the chaos is the true being.

The sights scare the very core,
Depths of emotion have now worn.
Held down by the gravity around,
Is there a way to break this bound?

Unbound

Flies roll and paths fly,
living life on a new high!
Winters blood and the heart's cold,
life takes an incomplete sigh

Depths write and fingers pause,
chaotic mind finds no sweet spot,
Blood flows and rivers run dry,
words stop at when the feelings rot.

Sights reach horizons and laughter halts,
a deeper thought injects the stance,
Fights with the soul and hugs to death,
leave the faith at a dangling dance.

Swallowing darkness and grains cease,
satisfying feeling come with the last,
Breaths lose beats and beats knock th sky,
its like a movie running super fast.

Faith faints and belief sets absence,
that sharp shard surfaces the presence,
Growth limps and cages walk,
its runs the cycle, weaving a web of nothingness.

Bounded in the Nothingness

Emotional Fools

My oldest and best poem ever. Inspiring people since 5 years. Thanks to Harsh Soni for saving it! 

This is a treasure!

We are those,for whom there is none;

we are those for whom there is the only One;

We are those,still crying in our hearts;

YES,We are those 'Emotional fools'

No reason to cry,no reason to sigh,

no reason to die,no reason to lie,

no reason yet to be...

One of those 'Emotional Fools'

In our dark days when we want to die,

We ourselves lie for not to die;

in our dark days when we want to live our lives to the fullest,

we experience the moments dullest;

Yes,we are those Emotional fools!!

Still trying to cry I don't know why?

Still trying to live and not to die!!

Still trying to cross the island of pain to reach,

the sea of mirth, Again;

Still trying not to be....

...one of those 'EMOTIONAL FOOLS'

Deserted

Lost in the darkness of the night,

Deserted in the crowd of my thoughts,

The words fall empty, and noiseless,

Breath loses its pace in this whirlpool.

Paths change tracks and crossroads fall often,

Not a reason left to move ahead,

Nor a drop to quench this thirst,

Worn in the scorching heat of words.

Mind seeks to be brimming full, while;

The heart needs a silent flow, outward.

Words are just a way, but destinations;

They are hazy, far away, and hard to reach.

Hope loses itself each time, lost in the chaos,

These paths will always remain the same,

To rise and pass this pain is to conquer;

The self within, to win, myself back.

http://media3.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/photo/gallery/090325/GAL-09Mar25-1783/media/PHO-09Mar25-155605.jpg

Caged

Caged in the web of my own dreams,

The spaces get smaller it seems,

The darkness around smiles,

Terrified, I’m, fighting these yokes holding me.

Nobody can save but just that One,

Where have you gone, I feel alone.

I won’t fear the valleys of death, for You live,

But these surroundings, sadness weave.

In the broken hearts, You come to live,

But these realities, these, do deceive.

Waiting for your arms to hold me close,

May in the calmness I lead a silent doze.

OH beautiful! Come to me, mend this heart,

It’s been hurt with those emotional darts.

My Savior reigns, I still need words comforting,

Hold me long, and heal these wounded wings.

 

caged_bird_by_meijeanie